I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
