I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
