In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
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