Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize