But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
