doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
