Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
