I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
