In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toyâ€
Randomize
