i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize