He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
