I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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