Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
