Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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