didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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