I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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