Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
