i just google imaged poop.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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