what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
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