He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
