Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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