Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I am one with the molecules
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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