i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
