Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
