May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
And then my night got REAL pukey
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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