i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
