I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
