So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize