fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
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