He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
