glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Randomize