I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
