erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
