Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
