So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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