youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
