Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
