dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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