I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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