Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
