Yo dont text me then not text me
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
