I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just want nice things and good sex
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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