How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
