Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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