ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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