why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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