You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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