I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Dick very happy bro
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
