You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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