Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Randomize
